The gods at your fingertips

Brilliantly tongue in cheek.
Check out godchecker
A site that I stumbledupon.
Provides for hours of entertaining reading.
Especially recommended is the Chinese section and the “deities” Jesus, Jehovah, Yahweh.
Religious zealots please refrain. Highly likely to cause indigestion and heartburn.

Highly recommended for atheists and agnostics and such other liberal kinds.

What the hell!

Question and answer

Well one fine morning this is what I found in my googletalk window
Well answered.
And toothpaste counts too. And I’d let you steal mine for a just cause
😉

A new discovery.

If you have been in a Mumbai local train you may have noticed those ubiquitious posters advertising the miraculous services of those great saints also known as Baba Bangalis.

And I thought that up here in the north we never needed them. But like cockroaches, they are everywhere. Only a different name.

Genus: Baba
Species: Sufi Shah.

advertising

He even specialises in some arcane art.
Nice business model. Anyone for setting up a metaphysical treatment chain?

Why my existence is complete or The Great Porno(b) show

I had heard a lot about the “man” well and I am happy to say that he stands shorter off the ground than I do.
So we went to the IMI bizquiz on Saturday which was also convocation day for the students passing out from MDI.
And when we got there we learnt that the quiz master was good ole Pornob (I kinda like that spelling, it seems to convey something sleazy about that man).
I’ll remember the next thing that Ramesh said, “Now lets have fun in the quiz”. Not win, have fun.
Interesting. The eliminations were decent enough and I thought as Rabi had said that he had “improved”. I should have known another Bong saying that. Pardon my naïveté.
We got to sit on stage. And then it dawned upon me. Wow! what a man. Pulling off questions off the top of his head like a magician pulling a rabbit out of the hat. And to complete the magician analogy, he is a master illusionist too. A few samples

1. Jagson airlines is supposed to have Pathankot airport as its hub which I think is just functional or yet to be functional
2. Peter Arnett was behind the branding of CNN, whereas he is the Pulitzer Winner, former CNN correspondant, accused by the former Bush administration of feeding viewers Iraqi propaganda
3. Village Roadshow Entertainment of Australia owns 51% of Fox Searchlight Pictures (well then how can it be a News Corp. company?)
4. The congress “hand” symbol was conceived by Arun Nanda at the behest of Rajiv Gandhi. It was actually the idea of Indira Gandhi. Nanda only came in after Rajiv Gandhi asked him to make ad-campaigns for the election campaign of 1989

Then we had some weird movies including one chinese movie made by a guy whose name sounded like “Wang Cor Wai” and is supposedly a master filmmaker.
Then the arbit scoring. Initially it was 10 direct – 5 pass. Then in the 5th round it became 10 pass-10 direct. Then in the 6th and last, he made it 10 direct – 11 pass. Huh??

I loved it when the “any topic under the sun” round came up.

Ramesh: Linux Kernel Device Drivers. (I am already
Porno: Lets make it the free software industry
Ramesh: We insist
Porno: I can’t let that.
Ramesh: Then, how about 3D FPS Games?
Porno: I’ll make it the gaming industry

But now he was quite pissed off and we were giggling like schoolgirls. Then came some obscure question about GTA San Andreas in which the character Carl Johnson is inspired by a movie character. Answer? Pat Garrett. Lets leave it at that.

At the end of it we were spilling our guts out laughing laughing all the way on the long ride back. All in all an experience. And I am sorry to say that his “disciples” did not win the quiz. Even with the eleven point scoring. And he did not read out our scores.

And I am definitely going to the next Porno Show, probably at DSE-MHROD. How can I resist cheap entertainment?
See all you guys there.

Radio Wars or how to start a fight without much ado

Ok. So you have a like 15 GBs of MP3s stored up on your hard disk. And you have listened to each song thrice and know all the lyrics by heart. So what do you do then? Start a hostel radio. Download and install the latest shoutcast plugins and server.Enqueue all the songs in winamp and push play.

There but who knows about it?

There is always MSExchange. Bill Gates’ beauty cum spammers’ dream come true. So you shoot off batch mails telling everybody what an awesome RJ you are and then wait for people to sign up. The names Radio K.A.O.S. All he can do is shamelessly rip off Roger Waters.

Oooh. Still no load? No problem. H. Shirouzu has just the thing for you. Its called IPMessenger. Every five minutes you ping the junta with messages like
For all the lovebirds: A Happy Valentine’s Day
Coming up Rock Hour
Bryan adams..and BOn jovi…just for u all!!!

Ok. We know no one wants your radio when we can choose our own songs. No. The gentleman insists. Then all the hatred goes public. Everyone lets loose all pent up venom and some want to hang him too. Oooh.
This is what my good friends think about it.

Listener

This gets too much for me. I can no longer chat with my good friend sitting two rooms away over the same IPMessenger. So much for technology. Sigh! Bill Gates and his ilk rule my life.

Song for my mood: Move by Miles Davis.

Random Fun or how to make your life enjoyable @ BSchool

Just Past Midnight, ground floor boys hostel

ME (Enter stage right, walk up beneath first floor railings look up and shout): Mansoooooooooooor. (Repeat thrice)

UNKNOWN FEMALE VOICE 1 (A tinny tone): Mannnnnnnnsooooooor
UNKNOWN FEMALE VOICE 2 (huskier): Mannnnnnnnsooooooor
RANDOM PERSON 1 (shouts): Mansoooooooooorrrr
RANDOM PERSON 2 (shouts): Mansoooooooooorrrr
PRANESH (looks up, shouts): Maaannnnnnnnsooooooooooorrrr.

MANSUR pops out like a beaver from his den. Looks dazed. Leans over the railing.

MANSUR: What is it?
ME: Which movie are you watching?
MANSUR: I’m doing work man, not watching any movie.

KARY (formerly unknown female voice 1): What about my write ups?
MANSUR: Huh!! (leans over a bit more.)

GORDON (in Mansur’s ears): Mansooooooor.
ME: Mansur, don’t jump. Pleeease.

A sizable crowd has collected. Unknown Female Voice 2(shrieks). Verghese comes down to the first floor. Everyone eggs him on to jump.

PRANESH (Opening his arms): I’ll hold you.

Verghese climbs over the railing and jumps. Pranesh moves away. Jandhyala steps in, but puts a hand between Verghese’s legs to catch him.

VERGHESE (screwing up his face): Dude, that’s not the way to hold a person!

All hold their sides, laughing. One sleepy soul, woken up comes out to check the fun. All disperse. He makes a sad face and goes back to sleep.

I come back to my room.

Song for the situation: ‘Round Midnight by Miles Davis.